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Quahog Holiday - Various Artists
There's a little town that's sweet and cozy
If you need a place to get away
Every street is clean and every face is rosy
And every teenage girl goes all the way
And just as spring is springy autumn's autumn
And everybody laughs when I say sodomy
Sodomy is a funny word
And they say family guy is smart comedy
Hehehehehehehe yeah right frickin' douche bags what the hell do they know
Come and take a holiday in quahog
Come and take a quahog holiday
They make corndogs at the grocery store
And last week we shipped out all the poor
I get wasted every single evening
D u i means drink up if you please
They serve booze at Sunday mass after you pray
It's a gas I dare say
Hop a jet plane straightaway
And take a quahog holiday
Peter they don't serve booze at Sunday mass that's communion wine
Well
Whatever it is that jackass reverend wouldn't refill my mug last week
I said to him listen buddy if I'm
Not wasted by the time we get to the last hymn
It's gonna be a personal slight to Jesus
What happened
They escorted me out
You know folks quahog really is a wonderful town
There's so much to do
You can have a picnic on the village green
Spend a day at the beach
Go to the mall
Or just hang around and shoot the s**t
Or if you're dyslexic tosh the tosh
Oh that's wonderful Brian make fun of learning disabilities you know sometimes
I have no idea who the deuce
You are
Hey it's Cleveland and quagmire
Hey can we jump in for a verse
Yeah knock yourselves out fell as
Heh heh heh all right
Come and take a holiday in quahog
And we mean every single day
Come and take a quahog holiday
Oh yes a happy holiday
We drink just like fish when we go out
Even though it gives me nasty gout
It's a town a single guy can thrive in
Till his pubic hair is old and grey
Gig gig giggity gig gig giggity gay giggity giggity gig gig giggity gig gay
It's a party every day
So take a quahog holiday
Hey look everybody it's mayor Adam west
Hello everyone I was in the neighborhood and I heard singing any time I hear singing
I have to join in
Come and take a holiday in quahog
Come and take a quahog holiday
Sure the local crooks may never rest
But they don't dare screw with Adam west
Every day you're cleaning up our city
Everything from crime to tooth decay
I'll teach any thug that crime won't ever pay
Then I'll lock them away and I call it a day
And take a quahog holiday
When I grow up I want to be just like you mr west
Well thank you son however
I should warn you that if you succeed in becoming exactly like me all the way down
To the molecular level it could upset the material constant of the universe
In which case I'd have to destroy you to ensure
The physical integrity of the fabric of space and time
I think my brain just peed itself
All right what do you say we wrap this thing up folks
Come and take a holiday in quahog
Come and take a quahog holiday
We think evolution's right as rain
Yes not like southern folks who've gone insane
We've got every color and religion
No one beats you silly if you're gay
If you feel your crazy life slippin' away
Pack your bags and don't delay
And come join us here today
And take a quahog holiday
And take a quahog holiday
