Ep57:Understanding People | 从细节看人心:8个微小举动看透人性-YyatTung

Ep57:Understanding People | 从细节看人心:8个微小举动看透人性

歌手:YyatTung

时间:2024-12-02

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喔耶耶耶喔

Hey

Everyone welcome back for another deep dive with us

You know how sometimes you just get a feeling about someone

Like you can kind of tell

Tell they're all about from small things they do oah well we're going to dive into that today i loit we're looking at an article by io dg of wsiga called eight really small things that tell you a lot about someone

Ah this sounds fascinating

Yeah

It's all about those subtle cuues

That can actually reveal a lot about a person's character

Their values

Their mind

Yeah

Some have those those small things are more telling them the big pronouncements and stuff

Exactly

So let's say you're at a networking event right

Or maybe you're meeting a new colleague for the first time

Being able to pick up on these cues that could be a total game changer

Yeah

For sure

So i will see this first point is something

I think we've all experienced how someone treats s experience

Yeah

You know like how they talk to a waiter

A berrista anyone in a service role

What is think why is that so revealing

Or i think it shows a lot about how someone views power dynamics

Ah ha you know how they act

When they think they have the upphhand like like are they using that power to be kind

Or they kind

I don't know abusing it yeah

Exactly

And studies have actually showing the people who are rude to like weight staff

They tend to have similar patterns too other relationships too take a consistent

Yeah

Think insistenthe pattern of behavior here exacactly remember mber reading phillips and bardo

He said the psychologists he did the stanford prison experiment

Yeah

He said that washing how someone treats a waiter is like the best treats waacter ter like a limness test

It is ah the basic human decently right okay so moving on another point that i was

It conmakes that really got me thinking is about polghtness

You know just those simple pleases and thank you

Yeah

Which honestly seem to be rare and rare are of these days

It's true

You don't hear as much anymore it's said i feel wewe're losing something important

I agree

But why do you think those basic manners are so important

You know it's fainy

It seems so simple

But those little words can really change the whole tone of an interaction

Right

It shows that you see the other person you're acknowledging their effort it's respect

Exactly it's a tiny sign of respect

And it just makes things run smoother

Totally it's like social lubricant um that's a good way to put it

You know yeah

It's true just greece es the wheeland you know what else is interesting studies have shown that pollieness can be contegious

Oh

Really yeah

Someonone's polite to us were more likely to be polite to others

So it's like a ripple effect

Yeah

Exactly it can actually make the world a nicer place

Ah i love that just by saying please and thank you

It's true

It's intelittle things right okay

So now i'll seek talks about something

That's a little less ververal have someone who walks

Oh

Interesting

He actually uses block obama as an example

Oh

Well okay

Talking about his like swagger or the eye power

Yes yes

You see that with a lot of leaders 's ceos

Even just people who are really confident themselves

Yes

What is it about the way they walk

That gives off that impression

Yes

What's lot of things

It's not just one thing

Yes Oay

It's

It's posture had held high

You know making eye contyes that's that energy here

Yeah

And it's interesting

Because a lot of this is unconscious

We're not like thinking okay walk powerfully

But our bodies are communicating all the time and people pick up on it exactly

And the cool thing is we can actually use this knowledge to our advantage

Oh

How so have you heard of the doorway technique

No tell me about it

It's from that book

The art of charm okay

And basically every time you walk through a doorway

Um you use it as a reminder to check your poster

Oh

I like that yeah had a shoulders back walk with purpose be present exactly and studies have shown that doing that even just that little adjustment

Yeah

It can actually make you feel more confident

Wow

It's amazing

How much our bodies and minds are connected

I know it's crazy like even just faking it till you make it can actually work

Yeah Okay

So now i was sugi gets into a point

That's don't little more

I don't know subtle um

It's about how people handle even slight discomfort like socisocial ah exactly okay

And uses this anecdo about a guet discomfort

Who didn't want to repeat his poor for casso

Casso yeah

Because he thought it would be awkward

Oh

I can see that it seems so small but a ozga argues that it reveals something bigger about how they handle those kinds of situation

Yeah

Like are they willing to speak up

Or theygoing to avoid any any tential aawkwdness

It's that interintercalculation

We all make you know between what we want and how much social friction we're willing to in door right

It's

It's not even just about the casso

It's like how does this person approach life and general right ah they going

Going shshow out from challenges or face ahead on

It's a good question to ask ourselves too totally

Where do we fall on that spectrum uh good point

Yeah are it let's move on

Is something a bit uh light hearted a of asseeka talks about how people respond to the success of others

Oh

That's a good

And he's the great example

But patent manning

Elly manning superbowl meme

Oh Yeah

I know

Exactly you buomb about the one

Where elly looks kind of bumb

Even though his brother just one super per boall

Yeah 对

It's perfect

Because it shows how some people they just can't be genuinely happy for others

It's true

Some people get really competitive yeah

And you have to watch out for those concern tlls

A lot of the concern rolls the people who disguised negativity as helpefulness right like go congrats the proprotion

But you'll be working so many more hours exactly or starting a business

Have you thought about all the taxes

Yes like they

They sciouslet you enjoy the moment

It's fruststrating right like common omme have this

It's

It's important to be able to recognize that i kind of disguised negativity definitely

Because it can really brnew you down

Sure sure

Ok

Let's shift ft a bit

It talk about about ind dset ve ve also can makes a really interesting point about the difference between saying i have to do something

Verses i get to do something

Oh Yeah

That's a powerful distinction

Right like i have to go to work

Verses i get to go to work

It changes your whole perspective

It does it's like one is a burden

The others an opportunity exactly 有

And i reent a study

Where people who were told to reframe their task as get to activities

They actually ended up

Feeling more positive and motivated

Wow

That's amazing right it shows how much power

Our language has it really does it can shape her whole reality

It's sure

It's like that saying change your thoughts

Change your world

I love that

So i'm trying to be more mindful of how i talk about things

Yeah

Good breaklike instead of saying right i have to go grocery shopping pping it's i get to go stock up on delicious food

That's aa great way

Look at it

Yeah

Makes a difference

Okay now let's talk about something we all do every day

Um those little conversations

Where you ask

Have you been or what's new

Oh Yeah

Those small talk moment

Exactly so often we just give those automatic responses

Good

Fine busy

Yeah

Totally guilty of that

But it's a missed opportunity

I think it is

I think so too

It's a chance to connect with someone to actually share something real

Yeah

And you know what i've noticed the people who are really engaged in life

Um there are the ones who light up

When you ask them that question

Oh

Totally they have something to share something they're excited to it's contagious that energy it really is you can't help to get drawn in yeah

You want to know more exactly so it's all strive to be those people

Yes Okay

Last but not least

We have a waskke's final point

The kid and dog test

好的好的 Oh

Tell me about that one

This one's always fun

Because it's about how children and animals react to people

Oh Yeah

They can be really good judges of character right like they just seem to know it's like they have a sixth tion ts

Yeah

They pick up on things miss ss because

Because theynot as influenced by words

I think um it's a good point

There are more attuned to energy to vide authenticity

Yeah

Exactly they see right through us

Yeah

It's amazing

So it's a reminder to pay attention to our own gut instincts too um

Because

Because sometimes our intuition knows things

That our logical mind hasn't figured out

Yet

Yeah

That makes sense

So there you have it those are a wassious eight small things

That tell you a lot about someone

Wow

We covered a lot of ground

We did it's a lot to think about it's fascinating though right it is

It makes you look at every day interactions in a whole new new light

It's like a secret code to understanding people

I like that a secret code

And it's not just about understanding others

It's about understanding ourselves too

Oh

Absolutely will

Will be right back after a short break to dive

Even deeper into these insights can't wait

So what really stood out to you from the first half of our deep dive

You know that thing about how people treat service staff

It really resonate with me

Yeah

Why is that well

It makes you realize those little interactions

They can actually show a bigger pattern

It's not

Not just an islated incident

It's

It's like glilimpse their overoverrespepefor others

That's a good point

Like if someone's willing to be rude to a waiter

Who's just trying to do their job right

What does that say about how they treat people in general acactly a good reminder to be be dful of how we treat everyone definitely regardless of their position

Or you know whatever it's about basic human decency okay

And why we're on the topic of the subtle leues

Yeah

I'have been trying out that doorway technique no hahas a go in

It's actually amazing every time i walk through a door

Now um i check my my posture head shoulders back

You're walking with purpose

I am

You know what i has just feel more confident

I believe it

It's amaders how much our body language affects our mental state

It's crazy rain yeah

Like just by changing how you stand

Yeah

You can change how you feel so powerful

Now this next next inside from aosaka

It's a bit more nuanced hm tell me about it

It's about how people handle discomfort or social friction

Oh

Like that case o example

Exactly the guy who didn't want to repeat his order

Yeah

It seems small

But wosaica says

It reveals something sathat wwilingness to asasserthemselves

Yeah

It's fefear of a little awkward this yeah

And it makes you think how does that play out in other areas of their life

Totally are they going to speak up at work

When i have a good idea or ask someone out on a date

Even if they're scared of rejection

Exactly it's about recognizing those patterns in ourselves too and pushing ourselves outside of that comfort zone

Sometimes because that's where the growth happens right

Exactly so speaking of pushing ourselves a whiska talks about how people respond to the success of others

Oh

That's always interesting any warns about those concern roal

Oh Yeah

The people who can't just be happy for you

It's like they have to find something negative to say right like oh

Congraton the new job but be careful of burnt out

Or that's a great idea for a business but have you considered the competition

Exactly as a they can't resist raining on your parade

It's so important to people to recognize that

So you don't let it get to you

I agree

Surrounjust of people who are genuinely supportive

Totally

Now something i found really empowering was a wasickous point about how we frame things

Oh Yeah

Like the half two versus get to mindset

Yes

It's so simple

But it can make a huge difference

It's like instead of i have have to of of the gym

It's i get to move my body and take care of heheth

Exactly

And i think that shift and perspective can really affect our overall well being

I agree it's about choosing to focus on the positive

Okay

Let's talk about another everyday situation

It can be a chantions tions

Where you ask how he been or what's new

Oh Yeah

The small talk

But it doesn't have to be small talk right

It can be a chance to connect

It can be an opportunity to share something you're excited about yeah

Something you're working on or looking forward to

And i've noticed that

When you do that it ofoften inspires the other person to share something too

It's like you're opening the door for more meaningful conversation

And you both walk away

Feeling a little more connected

Exactly it's about bringing our authentic ccels to those everyday interactions

Now let's move on to a wasick's final point okay the kid and dog test this ones always fun

It is

It's about how children and animals react to people

They just seem to know

Don't they i know it's like they have this built radar for authenticity

They see right through all the factuincts

Yeah

And i think it's because they're not as influenced by social conditioning theymore in tune with their gut instincts

Exactly they trust their intuition

Which is something we could all learn from it's a good reminder to pay attention to those good feelings

We get about people

Sometimes our intuition knows things that are gical mind hasn't cut up with yet so true well that wraps of all eight of a wheelseekers insights

Wow

It's amazing

How much we can learn about people just from paying attention to those small details

It's like we've been given a secret decoter ring for human bebehavior

I like that um

And it's not just about understanding others

Right about understanding ourselves

Too about becoming more mindful of our own actions

And how they impact others

Exactly

And now that were armed with this knowledge

How can we use it to create more authentic connections

That's the big question and one will contain ue need to explore i'm excited to die in me too okay

So we've talked about all these subtle things

That can tell us about a person

But how do we actually use this knowledge

It's not just about analyzing everyone we meet

Exactly

It's about self awareness too absolutely like are we treating others way we'd want

Want be htreout

Um are ing mindful of our own words and actions

Yeah

Are we the kind of person

We'd want to hang out with those are good questions to ask

It's about becoming more conscious more intentional

It's about walking the walk not just talking

The talk

Exactly you know i will see ka focused on those in person interactions

Yeah

But i think these insights apply online too

Yeah Oh

Totally social media is a whole other world of subtle hues

It is you can learn a lot about someone from their posts and comments

The're tone their a moj

I usage what they choose to share

Yeah

Even what they choose not to share

It's like a digital fingerprint

Um it's a good analogy

And it makes you wonder

How is all this online interaction changing how we communicate

嗯

Good question are we losing some of those non verbal queues

The facial expressions

The body language

Yeah

It's a lot harder to read someone through a screen

But i think those corporations will still apply alright

I think so paying attention

Being mindful trusting your gun

Um

I like that so as we wrap up

I want to leave you with something to think about

Okay

I'm intrigued

We've talked about people's behavior

Their words

Their body language

But what about their spaces

Their spaces

Yeah

Like their home

Their acices

Their car

Oh

Interesting

Those environments can tell you a lot about a person

I never thought about that way is it organized or chaotic minimalalist or maxilist are there personal touches or is it impersonal

Right you can learn a lot just by observing

Wow

That's a really cool perspective

So think think about your own space

What does it say about you

That's a great question for all of us to consider

Yeah

That's a fun exercise

Well

That brings us to the end of our deep dive today time flies

When you have been fun analzing

Today it really does

Thanks for joining us on this journey of subtle discoveries

Ies remember the world is full of fascinating clues

All you have to do

Is open your arise and pay attention and trust

Your get exactly until next time

Keep exploring and stay curious

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