My Mom's Orange Chair

How could it be? So many years have passed since there was a we

It impossible to understand me

You don’t know my family

You don’t know any of our ways

Living life is made up of a collection of days

I’ve a had a bunch of blues and whole lotta greys

We used to congregate there up stairs

My mom in her bed me or my sister on the orange chair

So many lifetimes ago to compare

To catch me reminiscing about that time is rare

My family don’t know you and it’s so true

They can’t really know me

For a while it was the nicest house on the block

We had pride inside at or least that’s what I thought

And This too shall pass

Bell rang like it was time for class and I woke up,

Anytime there was static everything would ignite

We talked less and less between the blowup fights

I’m not here to give the world a review

I made this for my son to listen

Oh don’t be so dramatic

You act like I’m a drug addict

You’d feel better I’d bet with a little dose of Darvocet

Let’s ignore what we said and just go to bed

And do it all over again some other time

Why’s it so hard to be free in mind, thoughts or physically

Everything costs even if it’s a nominal fee

It’s important to me to keep the history lesson,

And keep the memories present

And to keep my guard up against any new weapons

I should’ve done this when I was younger maybe

Time wasted and I’m faced with this blunder, maybe

I used to think living angry was fuel

Ready to take any slight smite to a fatal duel

Like that was cool

Always ready to do the most

My defense Chael Sonnen I can’t let you get close.

Spent way too much time figuring what other people think

Cold laps in my mind like an ice skating rink

It’s stupid but the truth is

This is how I got here

I still push through the bouts of fear

And I still prefer for no one to be near me

Always thought my grandmother would come to me

Or at least guide me or maybe feel her spirit beside me

But so far that’s been a dub

Or maybe I just have to wait my time

I might just be too far back in line

17 years in New York is a grind

But I can’t stop digging before I get mine

And while it’s dark outside I’m going to let this little light shine