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i am filing a formal complaint
against the way you used to blink
the tact of the fact is i’m leaving
the specific frequency of your blink
it’s recorded in the drywall now
next to the indentations of your knuckles
(sharp, sharp knuckles)
i’m scrubbing the floorboards with lye
to dissolve the residue of our tuesday
the bureaucratic weight of our tuesday
do you remember the taxidermy bird
the one with glass eyes by the sink
it had more life than our dialogue
in the final, calcified month
i’m prosecuting the memory of your hair
the way it clogged the porcelain drain
a tangled, wet, frantic knot
(cut it out, cut it out)
it’s an anatomical disaster
a failure of the infrastructure
this isn’t a longing
it’s a forensic reconstruction
i’m piecing together the trauma
of a friendship that became an object
a heavy, blunt, useless object
(useless, useless)
i saw you at the supermarket
handling the nectarines like evidence
the architecture of your posture was stiff
you didn’t see me behind the crates
i was counting the buttons on my coat
one for every time you lied
one for every time i flinched
the math is quite staggering
(staggering, staggering)
stitch the seam and pull it tight
wait for the rot to dry
i’m a curator of catastrophes
i’m a lawyer for the ghosts
(ghosts in the upholstery)
dismantle the etiquette
dismantle the anatomy
dismantle the whole damn year
(break it, break it)
this isn’t a longing
it’s a forensic reconstruction
i’m piecing together the trauma
of a friendship that became an object
a heavy, blunt, useless object
the file is closed
the ink is thick
the specimen is pinned to the board
(pinned, pinned, pinned)
i’m done with the preservation
(done)
the result is negative
abruptly negative
(tick)
