The World According To Chris

Guess what,

ever since the world began

Same plot, everyone's been dumping on their fellow man

Pounding people they feel better than

I hope you're taking notes cause

You feel everyone deserves a shot

Get real

Some of us have got it, girl

And some got squat

That's the truth, oh honey, like it or not

I hate to break it to you

My daddy taught me

You get no where being nice

So now I'm sharing his advice:

The world according to Chris is

Better to strike then get struck

Better to screw then get screwed

You'd probably think it's bizarre

But that's the way things are

But that doesn't mean it has to be

that way! What does it cost to be kind?

Ew, what have you done with my best friend?

Billy, tell me, am I right, or am I right?

Trust me

I swear

There's a d**k in every class

Not fair

Each and every time I fail those losers pass

Hey, everyone of them can kiss my ass

You wonder why I love him

One year, there was this good looking guy

So queer

And on top of that he has a wandering eye

One day he looks at me

And, huh, bye-bye

I bet he got the message

We're here to tell you how this whole damn freak show works

Oh, yeah yeah yeah

If you don't listen, then you're jerks!

The world according to Chris is

Better to punch than get punched

Better to burn than get burned

Learn that and you're gonna go far

Cause that's the way things are

Ha-na na na na na na na na

Ha-na na na na na na na

Ha-na na na na na na na na

Ha-na na na na na na na

Do you believe her?

C'mon, she's just being Chris.

You weren't there. It was awful. We were hurting Carrie!

Tommy: Ah, I'm sure it wasn't that bad.

Tommy, you don't understand

What was just a joke got out of hand

We kept on screaming til she hit the floor

Tommy: C'mon, everybody was doing it

Hey, I was in there, too

What came over me was something new

I did things I'd never done before

And now I wish there's something

I could do or say

I've never ever felt this way

Look, Sue

Don't be so hard on yourself

You can tell me to keep my mouth shut

But, wanna know what I'd advise?

What?

Apologize

Sue: Apologize. Oh, Tommy! That's genius!

Ew, Sue

I can tell you're feeling sad

Boo Hoo!

So, we clobbered Carrie and that's too damn bad

This is why you've gotta love my dad

He's got the right idea

My daddy taught me who's on top and who's below

Who's below

And now its time I let you know

The world according to Chris...

You're joking, right? You can't possibly mean all this?

Why are you being such a buzz-kill?

Chris, grow up

Ha-na na na na na na na

Ha-na na na na na na na na

Let's start this party, people!

The world according to Chris

The world according to Chris

The world according to Chris

The world according to Chris

The world according to Chris is

Better to whip than get whipped

Even if somebody bleeds

Please

Nobody dies from a scar

And that's the way things

Are