I Wanna Go Back To Dixie - Tom Lehrer
Well what I like to do on formal occasions
Like this is to take
Some of the various types of songs
That we all know and presumably
Love and as it were
To kick them when they're down
I find that
If you take the various popular song
Forms to their logical extremes
You can arrive at almost
Anything from the ridiculous to the obscene
Or as they say in New York sophisticated
I'd like to
I'd like to
Illustrate with several hundred examples for you this evening
First of all
The southern type song about the wonders of the
American south
But it's always seemed to me that most of these
Songs really don't go far enough
The following song on the other
Hand goes too far It's called
I Wanna Go Back To Dixie
I wanna go back to Dixie
Take me back to dear ol' Dixie
That's the only li'l ol' place for li'l ol' me
Ol' times there are not forgotten
Whuppin' slaves and sellin' cotton
And waitin' for the Robert E Lee
It was never there on time
I'll go back to the Swanee
Where pellagra makes you scrawny
And the Honeysuckle clutters up the vine
I really am a-fixing
To go home and start a-mixing
Down below that Mason-Dixon line
Oh poll tax how I love ya how I love ya
My dear old poll tax
Won'tcha come with me to Alabammy
Back to the arms of my dear ol' Mammy
Her cookin's lousy and her hands are clammy
But what the hell it's home
Yes for paradise the Southland is my nominee
Jes' give me a ham hock and a grit of hominy
I wanna go back to Dixie
I wanna be a dixie pixie
And eat cornpone 'til it's coming outta my ears
I wanna talk with Southern gentlemen
And put my white sheet on again
I ain't seen one good lynching in years
The land of the boll weevil
Where the laws are medieval
Is callin' me to come and nevermore roam
I wanna go back to the Southland
That y'all and shet ma mouth land
Be it ever so decadent
There's no place like home
