there was a door

after that i lived stuck in a corpse stuck in your bathtub

after that i learned how many like the scent of blood

after that my limbs went blue, i couldn’t move without manipulation

after that i learned to bleed myself to feel the warmth

after that i lost my sense of self to feel the warmth

after that nothing made sense except to feel the warmth

i am locked inside your

knocking: “open up”

bathroom, cleaning spilt milk from between my

water running: why am i like this?

fingers

i keep telling myself i’m safe with you-

knocking: “let me in”

r hands on my back, but am i

unlocking: why can’t i keep it closed?

everything you made me

opening: it isn’t fair

do in this pit, an emptiness only you

coming in: “life’s not fair”

can fill