Then You May Take Me to the Fair-Julie Andrews
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Guenevere

Spoken

Sir lionel

Sung

Do you recall the other night that I distinctly said you might

Serve as my escort at the next town fair

Well

I'm afraid there's someone who I must invite in place of you

Someone who plainly is beyond compare

That frenchman's power is more tremendous than I have e'er seen anywhere

And when a man is that tremendous

He

By right

Should take me to the fair

Sir lionel

Spoken

Your majesty

Let me tilt with him and smite him

Don't refuse me so abruptly

I implore

Oh

Give me the opportunity to fight him

And gaul will be divided once more

Guenevere

You'll bash and thrash him

Sir lionel

I'll smash and mash him

Guenevere

You'll give him trouble

Sir lionel

He will be rubble

Guenevere

A mighty whack

Sir lionel

His skull will crack

Guenevere

Well

Sung

Then you may take me to the fair

If you do all the things you promise

In fact

My heart would break should you not take me to the fair

Spoken

Sir sagramore

Sung

I have some rather painful news relative to the subject who's

To be beside me at the next court ball

You were the chosen one

I know

But as tradition it should go

To the unquestioned champion in the hall

And I'm convinced that splendid frenchman can easily conquer one and all

And besting all our local henchmen

He should sit beside me at the ball

Sir sagramore

Spoken

I beg of you

Ma'am

Withhold your invitation

I swear to you this challenge will be met

And when I have finished up the operation

I'll serve him to your highness en brochette

Guenevere

You'll pierce right through him

Sir sagramore

I'll barbecue him

Guenevere

A wicked thrust

Sir sagramore

'Twill be dust to dust

Guenevere

Sir sagramore

He'll feel a draft

Guenevere

Well then

Sung

You may sit by me at the ball

If you demolish him in battle

In fact

I know I'd cry were you not by me at the ball

Spoken

Sir dinadan

Sung

Didn't I promise that you may guide me to london on the day

That I go up to judge the cattle show

As it is quite a nasty ride there must be someone at my side

Who'll be defending me from beast and foe

So when I choose whom I prefer go

I take the strongest knight I know

And young du lac seems strongest

Ergo

He should take me to the cattle show

Sir dinadan

Spoken

Your majesty can't believe this blustering prattle

Let him prove it with a sword or lance instead

I promise you

When I've done this gaul in battle

His shoulders will be lonesome for his head

Guenevere

You'll disconnect him

Sir dinadan

I'll vivisect him

Guenevere

You'll open wide him

Sir dinadan

I'll subdivide him

Guenevere

Oh

Dear

Dear

Dear

Dear

Dear

Sung

Then you may guide me to the show

If you can carry out your program

In fact

I'd grieve inside should you not guide me to the show

Sirs lionel

Sagramore

Dinadan

Milady

We shall put an end to that galic bag of noise and nerve

When we do all that we intend to

He'll be a plate of french hors d'ouvres

Guenevere

I do applaud your noble goals

Now let us see if you achieve them

And if you do

Then you will be the three who go to the ball

To the show

And take me to the fair

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