Pinwheel (Explicit)

Chelsey said I’m too ****ed to drive. Can I stay the night? I’ll sleep on top of the covers

We were just kids in our underwear with our myspace hair pining for each other

And when Summer ends can we still be friends? I could be down to get high?

Chelsey said we’re the same. Never change. You will always be my guy

She dropped out of college and visited LA. Me, her, and Clay would draw and listen to Modest Mouse

We’d hook up in the bathroom with the shower on. One time I fully passed out

She made me the pinwheel form that Bright Eyes record and said remember when we saw them

Then Chelsey asked, “what are we?” I said I didn’t know. She bought a ticket for the northwest. I didn’t kiss her goodbye before I watched her go

I thought of her every day she was away. She wrote her door was always open so I drove up to Portland

We danced to the Magnetic Fields at some bar off Hawthorn. I tried drinking Whiskey. I thought it’d make her like me

She joked that I’d become a man. Flashed **** me eyes. We took another shot and then we forgot

She would shake. Make up a lie. Dip out for a while and come back with clouds in her eyes

I loved her through her darkest nights and when she kicks the spike I’ll tell her. But I spoke too soon

Chelsey you know you mean more to me than even I can believe. I like you more than like a friend and telling you now feels so stupid

She just smiled and said

If we’re still single when we’re 30 let’s get married

We’ll be haggard and old. All wrinkles and folds

I don’t wanna die alone

We lost touch. Every now and again I’d stare at that pinwheel and remember when we saw them

Chelsey always found a way to stay in my brain strung out and cinematic. Belligerent and emphatic as we aged

Life moves on. She’s doing fine. I see her online. She met a guy with a nice smile. Got a good job. Been clean a while

Years just pass down the track. I played a show at Mississippi Studios and she brought everyone she knows

Chelsey said you made me laugh. Let’s go for a walk. Been a while since we talked. I know it’s all my fault. Can we pick up where we left off?