Yep, this seems about right
Let somebody in, I’m alone by the end of the night
It feels less than okay
Especially cos I thought this time,
And I don’t know why, I just thought she would stay
Wait, I thought she would stay…
But she didn’t stay
Cos I didn’t say
“I want you to stay, but stay for me
Cos I deserve that, for me cos I am worth that”
And now
Now she’s on her way
Cos I never say
“I want you to stay for me”
And what if no one’s stayed
Cos I’ve always been afraid just to say…
So…
Please don’t abandon, well, me
Come back, let’s watch some TV
I need you right here with me, hanging out just like two best friends do
Yeah you might say “c u never”
But if I don’t ask I won’t ever
Get anything, anyone that I want and right now, well, that’s you!
So please don’t abandon it all
Come back to me, you asshole!
Nancy, just come back, I promise there’s more alcohol
Look, I’m sure you’re already halfway to his place
But here’s a voicenote
Just in case
**** this ****ing app
Shit! The signal’s ****ing crap
SCREW YOU! SCREW THIS!
Great, my phone is out to get me!
Why will no one let me
Just do this?!
Ugh, Oliver’s a git for saying all that shit
They’re just so wrong
Cos this is what I want
It’s everything I’ve wanted for so long
So why do their words
Spin
Spin around
In my head
When it’s all I’ve ever wanted and want still?
I can’t stay
Far away
This is real!
This is happening!
Like, this is not a drill!
And although
Deep inside
Yeah, I know there is something there that I can’t seem to fill
I know
I know
That if this doesn’t make it better, nothing ever will
Still they spin spin spin those words:
“Maybe there’s a reason why you can’t let go”
Still they spin spin spin… oh **** my uber’s here…
**** - things don’t feel as they were
For the first time I don’t feel like I’m someone’s side character
I forced myself in that role
The friend who just cheers on the friend
Who ends up with the guy when the end credits roll
But now I’m going to
Take the leading arc
Like I’m Oliver
EXCLAMATION MARK!
Like I could
Be the Rachel or the Ross
And I know I can because
Though I have all this fear
And it will appear
When someone gets near
At least I know that, after all these years
Know that I can let those fears go
Yes - I can abandon it all!
I’m out on the ledge, I might fall
But that doesn’t matter now
I’m no disco ball, I FEAR NO ONE!!!!!!!!!
Fully open to rejection!
With no self-defence or protection!
NO SAFETY, NO ANYTHING
OH MY GOD WHAT THE **** HAVE I DONE???!!!
I’VE JUST ABANDONED IT ALL -
Holy ****ing shit
This is not a bit
**** I’m such a git
Oh Christ
I sent her that voicenote, she’s gonna listen
Oh ****, I’m just gonna delete it, unsend it
Shit, can you unsend stuff these days?
It might not have sent
I’m sure it didn’t send
**** **** ****
Does two ticks mean it’s delivered?
Does that mean it’s seen, or delivered?
Am I even connected? Am I online?
MY WIFI IS SO SHIT!!!!!
DID SHE GET THE VOICENOTE??
DID SHE GET THE VOICENOTE?!?!?!?!?
I GOT OFF THE PLA- wait what voicenote?
