Check On The Welfare

When all chose to ignore me, when all were fed before me, when I was forced to stand and watch, when all I've ever been was in the way - I'm forced to relive this every day.

Old familiar, I know you've been waiting.

I need to feel you wrap your arms around me.

It's been so long, and I'm so tired. Embrace me.

I beg death to embrace me.

Hold me.

Hold me still.

I caught the ghost of mercy in freefall.

I cleaned her wounds. I made her my sister.

We pressed our foreheads together to share a dream of peace, to share a dream of everlasting peace.

She kisses my forehead, leans in and whispers"seek no light in this abyss."

I set my foot on the bridge with no intention of crossing, to give relief to me.

So thankful for gravity, my body on a strange trajectory.

Though I look up to see bottom, I can't keep from looking down.

I can't keep my feet off the edge.

I can't keep my body on the bridge.

There's no way to reach me.

No one knows how to find me.

The house will stay empty.

Hours mutate into days that stretch into years, each of which feels like a lifetime of fear.

Knowing how I'll hurt those who love me will be insufficient to keep me here.

I'm afraid of the impact but I welcome relief.

Her warm, soft arms so welcoming.

Let me have peace.

May that embrace hold me.

Hold me still.

Give me peace.

I'm afraid of the impact, but I welcome relief.

Her warm arms so welcoming.

Embrace me.

Hold me still.

I beg death to embrace me.

Hold me still.