My Wife Is On A Diet - Harry Hudson
What's the greatest problem now throughout the land
What's the only problem needs a helping hand
It isn't Philip Snowden or tax relief I find
It's something more important now on everybody's mind
Just walk into any home today
It's ten to one you'll hear each husband say
My wife is on a diet and since she's on a diet
Home isn't home any more
No gravy and potatoes just lettuce and tomatoes
Where are the pies I adore
Oh oh oh oh what a disgrace
I'm ashamed to look a grapefruit straight in the face
My wife is on a diet and since she's on a diet
I'm losing a pound every day
Monday grapefruit breakfast and for dinner
And at night some orange juice
Tuesday grapefruit boys I growing thinner
All my clothes are getting loose
Wednesday Thursday I feel satisfied
Then I change to coffee with grapefruit on the side
Friday till Sunday is more than I can stand
Before the eighteenth day I'll have a lily in my hand
My wife is on a diet and since she's on a diet
Home isn't home any more
No gravy and potatoes just lettuce and tomatoes
Where are the pies I adore
Crabs and shrimps I must leave alone
I'm the only lobster she'll allow in my home
My wife is on a diet and since she's on a diet
She's gaining a pound every day
