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Love in a Haunted Attraction - Bone Daddy/the Boneyard Buffoons
Composed by：Jason Darrell Conner
Welcome to Inferno
Please keep your hands to yourself at all times
Unless you're holding mine
I was assigned to Corridor 3
Victorian ghost with mild backstory
My chain kept snagging on the fog machine
And I kept saying"boo" too politely
You were the zombie by the exit sign
Stage makeup melting by nine
You tripped on a rubber bat prop
And apologized to the customers
We locked eyes over a strobe light flash
Both slightly out of breath and fake blood splash
You whispered"Is my ribcage crooked?
I said"No but my heart just shifted"
Fog rolled in the soundtrack screamed
But suddenly the jump scare felt like a meet-cute scene
Love in the haunted attraction
Falling for you in full corpse fashion
Your chains rattle in perfect rhythm
My cold dead heart just gained circulation
Between animatronic clowns and bad ventilation
We found romance in mild damnation
It started as method acting
Now it's real ghostly interaction
You offered me half your fake eyeball
Said"Protein's important during fall"
We hid behind a plastic tomb
And shared a thermos of mushroom soup
The manager yelled"Stay in character"
While we debated couples therapy for vampires
You practiced your lurch and moan
I helped adjust your exposed foam bone
A teenager said we weren't that scary
But honestly that felt secondary
Because when you brushed my skeletal hand
Even the fog machine brushed on my man
Chains clanked like wedding bells
Somewhere near the inflatable well
Love in the haunted attraction
Your latex wounds are my distraction
We scream for work but laugh off shift
Our chemistry's an accidental gift
Among the cobwebs and fake dismemberment
We built something strangely permanent
What started as seasonal unemployment
Turned into emotional deployment
Turned into emotional deployment
We clocked out at 11:45
Still partially undead but fully alive
Sat on hay bales by the parking lot
Discussed a five-year haunted plot
You said you dream of opening a maze
With ethical ghosts and fair wage
I said I'd haunt by your side
Even in off-season even in daylight
We carved our names in a prop gravestone
Sharpied hearts on styrofoam
The chains fell off the wigs came loose
Till I found you drop-dead cute
Maybe we're awkward
Maybe we hiss instead of flirt
Maybe our love language is jump scares
And sharing grease paint remover
If this is just a seasonal fling
Then why does my ribcage sing?
Why does my zombie limp straighten when you grin?
Love in the haunted attraction
From stage fright to real attachment
No script no cue no direction
Just stupid natural connection
Through every shriek and overreaction
We found warmth in fake cadaver fashion
Even if the haunt shuts down in spring
You're my favorite terrifying thing
Please exit through the gift shop
Unless you'd like to stop forever
